Showing posts with label ......... Show all posts
Showing posts with label ......... Show all posts

Saturday, January 7, 2012

celebrating2011

i must admit that there was a lot of apprehensions and worries at the onset of my 2011.  being in the adjustment process brought by the big decisions in terms of career and transfer here in the metro was a struggle and at the same time a challenge.  not to mention, a little of the baggages from the past was still haunting me.

then again, God was (is) good.  i witnessed how heaven walked its way patiently during the entire year.  i experienced how the spirit of God allowed me to open myself up through little steps and through various encounters and opportunities.  everything just turned out to be gifts all on its own.  and as i saw the year come to an end, i also realized that i got much better. i knew i was stronger and ready for take off again.

there are countless blessings received that i will always be grateful for.  but i would also like to highlight some events that made the year extra special.  in no particular order of value, again thank you Lord for 2011.

this may appear like a cliche but my family (the wind beneath my wings) is my greatest gift for the year.  i really don't speak of them a lot but it is particularly this year that i got to feel their presence in a very special way.  the saying does runtrue that our families will never let us down.  i knew they know about my sadness and my struggles, but they allowed me to have things on my own pace.  i know how much they long to see my used-to-be-smiles, my signature laughs and my high energy for life, those i believe they also start to see one day at a time.  they're presence had been a gift to my healing soul and hopeful heart.

the year was also a fulfillment of my long-time dream to marvel sagada .  it was a dream come true to finally reach the destination and travel with via yang and bro.  the chance to breathe fresh and cold air was salt and pepper to my soul. (http://www.bagonglangit.blogspot.com/2011/04/summertime.html).

my birthday outreach (http://www.bagonglangit.blogspot.com/2011/05/beautifulsouls.html) was also a huge blessing to me. the chance to be accompanied by beautiful souls in sharing our time with the children of virlanie became a reminder that i am blessed in so many ways and that life (short or long) has still a lot in store for me.

bagongLANGIT.blogspot.com turned one year.  as i often say, the site was born to fill in the emptiness within.  he's become a twin, a bestfriend, and a counselor all in one.  in the countless times when i had my u-turns and relapse and in a number of times of my surprising zest and hopeful sighs, he's become the witness of it all.  MYAngligaw (though lost) still got to feel what home is and thus was never alone.


2011 is special because of my uaap season 74 experience.  to finally see basketball games coming to life was thrilling in every way.  i had the opportunity to watch the games with new and old friends.  weekends turned out to be vitamins to me.  and whether people believe it or not, this experience turned out to be comfort zones to me and allowed me to take off some of the layers of my fears and inhibitions.  i started to look into my care-free self again and imagined seeing myself soar the skies again.


myMVP (emmanMonfort) was a big factor for my happy september weekends. just watching him play basketball completed my days.  oh, i just love him to the bone. he calls the play. he passes the ball. admu scores (http://www.bagonglangit.blogspot.com/2011/09/mymvp.html.).  and yah, he reminds me of my happy heart too (http://www.bagonglangit.blogspot.com/2011/09/flashknows.html).


eat.pray.love.RUN.and love some more.  my running journey  also celebrated its first anniversvary (runningMYA).  just when i thought i will never have that patience to do long distance running, i was surprised of the desire to just run.  i admit that i decided to run as my form of deviating my thoughts and focusing my energy to something more productive.  but after realizing that it also provides me with a different kind of bliss, i also saw myself determined to push harder and work harder to achieve my goals.  i got the chance to run 11 marathons (1-3k, 1-10k, 9-5k).  each marathon with different sets of friends.  icing on the cake of course is the fulfillment of my 21k (half marathon) finish.  i am not a very good runner, but i know that my heart flies every tie i do it.  after all, it is good for my heart (literally and figuratively).



meet and greet the journeyingjames (http://journeyingjames.com/).  i am an avid fan of what he does and a follower of his blogs.  it was a pleasure to finally meet him during the  (camSur 2011 international marathon) last september.  it was fun sharing stories with him over dinner with friends from home.  truly an honor! :)

a piece of home at the metro is truly a blessing and happiness to me.  although time spent is limited, chit chats and meas shared turn out to be absolute fun and adventure.  their presence is a comfort that brings the warmth of home and family. and by home is also the inclusion of my most beloved bicolMoon turning  manilaMoon. :)

cherry on the top is the gift of time with  RuSs and Leigh.  
cherry on the top is the gift of time with  RuSs and Leigh.  
one thing i know, ill count this twice every time i'll count my 2011 blessings (http://www.bagonglangit.blogspot.com/2011/11/spellhappiness.html.) need i say more?

my adMu family. it may not show very well, but i have learned to love them as they are.  i may find a lot of differences from where i used to be, but these differences helped me get through each day and made me braver in my learning process.  it may not be the kind of team that i see, but heaven knows that each day with you was a chance to know myself more and discover hidden strengths. it is also with these discoveries that i also thank God for the new work assignment for 2012.  as i take on a new job (which is my dream job) i continue to beg you for the strength i will need to take on the new responsibilities.  yes! yes! i 'll push myself more to higher grounds! 

my adNu. my home.  when i left home, i was scared of going back.  the idea of seeing everyone was a perfect way of witnessing a lonely heart.  it was indeed a big surprise that i felt my heart smiling, laughing and even releasing happy sighs when i spent time with them over the holidays.  i cannot say it's picture perfect, but i can say that it's a good start.

absolute foodie, here she is again. i started to turn on the stove and cook simple meals for myself and my sisters.  my eyes grew big when i realized i was cooking again.  i guess i was too surprised seeing myself in the kitchen again.  this is definitely a good sign. and i know i am better when i am ready to do desserts.  in time. in time. ref cake on the start up line!

my secret strength, theYellowGuy.  he's not your ordinary stress ball, he's like harry's wand or tinkerbell's dust. toxic and unfair days at the office end up with a smile at the sight of him.  he was also chanting for me to push to the finish line during my 21k dream.  and when some people think i am crazy, he smiles and agrees with me when i say no i am not, i am just a little unwell.  then i smile again.. just like magic. :)

i believe i tried and worked harder to turn my 2011 a better one for me.  as i acknowledge and embrace the truth that i am not 100% ok, i respected my personal space at the same time took baby steps of going out of my shell and breaking free from the sad zone.  i know that it may still take a little while, but with high hopes, i will make sure a stronger and better me will come to life.

finally seeing myself laughing my heart out.  my sister once told me that she misses the old me.  she said that she does not seem to see the same eyes that i used to have.  i know she is right.  maybe because i have not heard myself laugh so often anymore.  and this picture just sparkle a turning point as a start this 2012.  yes, i also miss my old self.  thank you free spirit and batang bubuwit for the captured moment.  i will take this with me in my back pack as i start this new year.  this will serve as my sticky-note that life is indeed short so i must choose to be happy.  that is the only option. so, how about a new profile pic for 2012?

07 january 2012 sabado

Monday, September 26, 2011

dancingAWAY

after more than a year in this new heaven
after having tried so hard to build new friendships
after avoiding so many things that serve as reminders
after 588 days of dying
after 588 days of still staring at same sky
and after completing a 21k run without thinking of flightless birds and sleeping beauties

here i am, dumbfounded with the truth that nothing has really changed
i still have the same heart, same cut, same beat
i am still that same nikki who hoped that the choice made was not just an option

i am crying with sadness embracing me now
i am also crying with hope that my one day (just one day) will come

just one day

092622monday

Sunday, September 18, 2011

sleepingBEAUTY

Love Romance Desire by WithLuv.comdid you know that i hold the world's record for being the woman who have fallen in love with the same guy for 886 times (and counting)?

oh well, now you know.. :)

sorry, ganun eh!!

091811sunday

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

irisEYES :)

basahin na parang nakikita ninyo akong malayang tumatako/lumilipad dahil sa araw na ito,
isang taon ng tumatakbo ang MYAngligaw..
-------------------
Pilosopong Komikero: hirap ka na ngang huminga, takbo ka pa ng takbo...
(habang nagtatalo sa lrt)
-----------------

dahil ang totoo, sa pagtakbo ko lang buong tapang kayang sabayan ang pagdaan ng panahon.
sa pagtakbo ko lang nararamdaman na kayang kaya kong salungatin ang kapos na pag hinga ko.
sa pagtakbo ko lang nararamdaman na kaya kong harapin ang lagay ng buhay ko ngayon.
sa pagtakbo ko nararamdaman na kayang kaya kong labanan ang ikot ng oras. 

dito, naipipikit ko ang mata ko at buong-buo kong nararamdaman na malaya ako.
dito, nagagawa kong tingnan ang finish line na (may luha man) may matamis pa rin na ngiti.

sa pagtakbo ko nararamdaman na biyayang maituturing dahil naranasan kong mahalin,
at lalong naranasan kong magmahal ng totoo.

------
kamakailan lang ay sinagot ng langit ang isang taon ko ng kahilingan.. hindi man ito buo, taos puso ang pasasalamat na iniiaalay ko..

sapat na para sabihin ko sa langit na handa na ako..


ngayon, mamaya, bukas, o sa susunod na araw,

anytime LORD, be my guest.. :)

072611tuesday (masaya ako.. really.. :) )


the best songs to listen to when one is running is something that would make one fall in love with God, life, people, everything about love and its in-betweens. 
eat.pray.love.run.and love some more. - MYAngligaw2011





One Republic - Good Life Mp3
Mp3-Codes.com

special credits go to SingingHaven for introducing me to this song :)
supper thanks :)

Sunday, June 12, 2011

blueMOON

it was independence day when cgc gave me their send off last year.. i can still see the faces of the people who were there to send me their love and support for the biggest decision i have ever made in my life.. again, thank you for the roses, for the dance, videos, songs, hugs, messages, happy tears, love and friendship.

video courtesy of MuntingTinig; words by BraveHeart

know that i miss you everyday..
from the lenses of SmilingEyes


(sorry, i don't have a copy of the other pictures)

i hope to see you all soon.. :)

061211sunday



Wednesday, June 8, 2011

heavenSCENT

its raining outside.. i took a deep breath (as i have always loved the smell of rain) and suddenly, the smell of it reminded of me home again (i have been thinking of going home the past days.. :( ) in so doing, i thought that writing about my favorite scents in the world would help ease the sudden loneliness i have inside my heart now.

the morning air. together with the sight of the beautiful mt. isarog, you serve as good morning pop ups before i go to work.

ivory soap. it was still innocence when i fell in love with you. your scent always brought me to a world of gentleness and mildness.  night baths are the bests because of you.  

freshly cut grass. one thing i love about adnu is your once a month party.  the smell of your greens are like stimulants to me (hehe.. addict).

everbilena's blackwater (for men) aqua scent. you are peace and serenity to me. you are contentment and security to me. your scent is home, is refuge. i love it on my sheets. every sleep is like lying on clouds, and dreaming of happy things and bestest sighs. can i keep you?

night beach. its always a gift to smell you and at the same time enjoy the sight of my moon and its stars.  you are witness to every love-story-turned-pale in my life. and you always placed high hopes on me to hear me utter the words "next please."

toasted sipao, chicken skin, corned beef, badi. how do i love thee, let me count the ways. 

elizabeth arden's green tea. the smell of citrus, peppermint, and soft musk never fails to excite my nostrils and my spirit. 

mama's scent and clothes. its weird that even if she changes colognes or perfumes, its like the same scent that i keep smelling since i was a kid.  amazing grace.

its only now that i realized that the scents i love the most are very much associated with where my home really is.. i look forward to discovering new scents here in my new heaven.  in time... 


060811 wednesday (oh, its wednesday)

Thursday, April 7, 2011

wishingFOUNTAIN

Pouting by G.Park









hi or hello lang naman ok na,
hindi naman ako humihingi ng mcdo fries..


yun lang naman oh.. :(



040711thursday

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

beyondBESTS

what i am feeling right now is being thankful to heaven even if  i know that my ultimate dream and happiness will never be mine.. 


what i am feeling right not is being thankful to heaven for the chance of watching someone sleep even if i knew i had all the chances to go out and play in the rain..


what i am feeling right now is being thankful to heaven for allowing me to witness the sweetest smiles and the most assuring eyes i have ever seen in my life..


what i am feeling right now is being thankful to heaven for wednesdays, full moons, deep sighs and endless love..


what i am feeling right now is being thankful to heaven,
because at the end of the day,
i can still manage to love and laugh even if it hurts big time.. 


oh well, here comes the sun after all... : )


(just a reply to Seraphim)..
goodnight Seraphim.. just thinking aloud again.. 
hai14..


022311wednesday
(see, its wednesday)






Free MP3 Downloads at MP3-Codes.com

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

missingRuSs

10.30 daw ang call time nila, kaya nagmadali naman ako.
45 minutes na kong naghihintay wala pa rin sila.
bwisit. uuwi na sana ako.
hay. (wala pa rin talagang pinagbago ang mga tao).. toinks..

pero naging masaya naman ako nung makita ko sila.
pusong matapang. free spirit. munting tinig. fine china. 
bolang de kanto. 
humabol sina teddy bear, seth, pilyong querubin, at dancing shoes.
pero mas naging masaya ang araw
dahil nakita ko si RuSs.
kahit likod lang niya, sapat na.

pwede na kong umuwi..

122810tuesday
(kaya  naman pala, wednesday bukas)

ps.
syempre, this blog is not open for comments. : )

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

RUSSianriver

Miranda's Birthday Cupcakes by organicpixelang pinaka amazing na taong nakilala ko. ang pinaka mahalaga at pinaka mahal ko sa lahat. i am really, really proud of you.. and i will always be proud of you. siya ang blue moon ko. blue moon man daw, dumaan pa rin. gaya ng lagi kong sinasabi, everytime i count my blessings, i count you more than once.. thank you for everything.. thank you for making me happy..  know always that i value you more than youll ever know, and that i love you far more greater than you can ever imagine.

happy birthday.
be happy.

(Myas request: this blog entry is not open for comments.. : )

091410tuesday