Friday, December 31, 2010
hai14
its the last day of the year.
2011 may just be about figures,
it may be about new beginnings..
but yes, it can still be about keeping promises, and vows
i can only hope.
i can only rely on miracles.
wishing everyone a happy year ahead. : )
123110friday
366DAYS
God is always true to His promise that whatever He started in you, He will take it to completion because He perfectly loves you.. Nothing is hard if the heart has love; nothing is impossible when the heart understands; and nothing is heavy when God is in your heart.. -forwarded text-
Mya: so flightless bird, whats your new years resolution?
Flightless Bird: thats easy, for 2011, i will continue to choose him in a heartbeat.. as always.. will always..
Mya: toinks.. whats new about that?
Flightless Bird: thats the point, 2011 is just a number.. aside from that, things will remain the same.. my heart will remain the same..
Mya: youre crazy...
Flightless Bird: im not, im just loving.. (haha.. yah, maybe i am crazy)..
Mya: bahala ka nga..
Flightless Bird: dont worry, ill be fine.. its a choice i made.. its a promise i vowed.. : )
Mya: so flightless bird, whats your new years resolution?
Flightless Bird: thats easy, for 2011, i will continue to choose him in a heartbeat.. as always.. will always..
Mya: toinks.. whats new about that?
Flightless Bird: thats the point, 2011 is just a number.. aside from that, things will remain the same.. my heart will remain the same..
Mya: youre crazy...
Flightless Bird: im not, im just loving.. (haha.. yah, maybe i am crazy)..
Mya: bahala ka nga..
Flightless Bird: dont worry, ill be fine.. its a choice i made.. its a promise i vowed.. : )
you asked me if there was a time
that i have grown tired of you
never my love
never my love
123110friday
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
missingRuSs
10.30 daw ang call time nila, kaya nagmadali naman ako.
45 minutes na kong naghihintay wala pa rin sila.
bwisit. uuwi na sana ako.
hay. (wala pa rin talagang pinagbago ang mga tao).. toinks..
pero naging masaya naman ako nung makita ko sila.
pusong matapang. free spirit. munting tinig. fine china.
bolang de kanto.
humabol sina teddy bear, seth, pilyong querubin, at dancing shoes.
pero mas naging masaya ang araw
dahil nakita ko si RuSs.
kahit likod lang niya, sapat na.
pwede na kong umuwi..
122810tuesday
(kaya naman pala, wednesday bukas)
ps.
syempre, this blog is not open for comments. : )
Monday, December 27, 2010
foodFAVE
EAT.pray.run.
thats how i spent the last quarter of the year sa bagong langit ko. since na miss kong sobra ang luto ni mama, at pati na mga paborito kong pagkain dito sa bicol, i also find time to discover my new favorites.. heres my top 5 favorite foods na hinahanap hanap ko din, either because of a day to celebrate, or a not-at-all-good day i had..
lumpia shanghai with rice from chopsticks house. ang recent top favorite kong kainin at kainan sa metro. its your typical chinese restaurant. what i really like best here is that it reminds me so much of home, of oyster villa.. songs played are often times of the late 80s and of the 90s.. dito ako kumakain kapag nalulungkot ako.. or kapag naging masaya din ang araw ko.. pagkatapos kong kumain dito, i would usually spend time sa fully booked and find good reads (pero hindi ko naman binibili.. dagdag lang sa lista ko ng hahanaping libro kapag may sale..).. by the way, i realized the name of the restaurant only on my 5th time to eat there.. damn.. :)
binalot sa dahons tinapasilog. its your usual sinangag with fried garlic bits,with three pieces of tinapa and sunny side up egg (i always request the cook to have the egg in malasado style).. the place is quite similar to nagas tribo grill. since i miss home cooking a lot, hinahanap hanap ko ang tinapa every now and then.. but mostly, gusto kong kumain dito after a marathon, or just an ordinary run, or a good swim.. ate, extra rice please..
nasilemaks boneless chicken.. its singaporean cooking. rice is cooked in coconut juice which gives it a bit of a sweet taste. chicken is served with sunny side up egg and sidedish of anchovies, cucumber, peanuts and chili paste to match the sweet taste of rice. so far, ito ang pinaka mura sa lahat na usual kong kinakain.. :) aside from the cheap price, i love the way they pronounce the word nasilemak everytime they call out for customers.. simple joys..
grilled chicken with sweet chili sauce and mashed potato and a cup of bacon rice made available at world chicken restaurant. boneless grilled chicken is their main menu. side dish may be pasta, mashed potato, rice, fried bananas, or muffins..it is best to eat here kapag sobrang gutom talaga ako at kapag may kasama.. that way, i can have my friend order a different side dish or have a different sauce sa chicken niya para pwede akong humingi... a perfect place for chicken lovers!! right chubs?
peking gardens peking duck roll.. actually, once pa lang naman ako nakakain nito.. its courtesy of an office dinner out activity.. syempre, dahil sosi ang mga kasama ko, sosi din ang pinuntahan namin.. the waiter comes in with a whole peking duck and cuts it into thin strips.. after serving the duck strips and the other ingredients, youll have to prepare the roll na kakainin mo.. on your pita wrap, spread the sauce ad put in the duck, cucumber, and spring onion.. wrap it up and its ready to eat.. hayy.. sobrang sarap niya talaga.. kelan kaya ako makakabalik doon.. haay... sarap...
so, thats it for now.. in place of home cooking and nagas best, i can settle for these..
yun nga lang, i wonder how it would be kung kasama ko rin sila kapag kinakain ko itong mga bagong paborito ko..
yah, maybe next time..
122710monday
thats how i spent the last quarter of the year sa bagong langit ko. since na miss kong sobra ang luto ni mama, at pati na mga paborito kong pagkain dito sa bicol, i also find time to discover my new favorites.. heres my top 5 favorite foods na hinahanap hanap ko din, either because of a day to celebrate, or a not-at-all-good day i had..
lumpia shanghai with rice from chopsticks house. ang recent top favorite kong kainin at kainan sa metro. its your typical chinese restaurant. what i really like best here is that it reminds me so much of home, of oyster villa.. songs played are often times of the late 80s and of the 90s.. dito ako kumakain kapag nalulungkot ako.. or kapag naging masaya din ang araw ko.. pagkatapos kong kumain dito, i would usually spend time sa fully booked and find good reads (pero hindi ko naman binibili.. dagdag lang sa lista ko ng hahanaping libro kapag may sale..).. by the way, i realized the name of the restaurant only on my 5th time to eat there.. damn.. :)
binalot sa dahons tinapasilog. its your usual sinangag with fried garlic bits,with three pieces of tinapa and sunny side up egg (i always request the cook to have the egg in malasado style).. the place is quite similar to nagas tribo grill. since i miss home cooking a lot, hinahanap hanap ko ang tinapa every now and then.. but mostly, gusto kong kumain dito after a marathon, or just an ordinary run, or a good swim.. ate, extra rice please..
nasilemaks boneless chicken.. its singaporean cooking. rice is cooked in coconut juice which gives it a bit of a sweet taste. chicken is served with sunny side up egg and sidedish of anchovies, cucumber, peanuts and chili paste to match the sweet taste of rice. so far, ito ang pinaka mura sa lahat na usual kong kinakain.. :) aside from the cheap price, i love the way they pronounce the word nasilemak everytime they call out for customers.. simple joys..
grilled chicken with sweet chili sauce and mashed potato and a cup of bacon rice made available at world chicken restaurant. boneless grilled chicken is their main menu. side dish may be pasta, mashed potato, rice, fried bananas, or muffins..it is best to eat here kapag sobrang gutom talaga ako at kapag may kasama.. that way, i can have my friend order a different side dish or have a different sauce sa chicken niya para pwede akong humingi... a perfect place for chicken lovers!! right chubs?
peking gardens peking duck roll.. actually, once pa lang naman ako nakakain nito.. its courtesy of an office dinner out activity.. syempre, dahil sosi ang mga kasama ko, sosi din ang pinuntahan namin.. the waiter comes in with a whole peking duck and cuts it into thin strips.. after serving the duck strips and the other ingredients, youll have to prepare the roll na kakainin mo.. on your pita wrap, spread the sauce ad put in the duck, cucumber, and spring onion.. wrap it up and its ready to eat.. hayy.. sobrang sarap niya talaga.. kelan kaya ako makakabalik doon.. haay... sarap...
so, thats it for now.. in place of home cooking and nagas best, i can settle for these..
yun nga lang, i wonder how it would be kung kasama ko rin sila kapag kinakain ko itong mga bagong paborito ko..
yah, maybe next time..
122710monday
Sunday, December 26, 2010
crossingFINGERS
its nice to be home.. the time to be with family gives me a pleasant feeling.. not to forget, i really looked forward to mamas home cooking again.. thats why im making the most out of the food available here.. haha..
on the other hand, i still chose to just stay here and watch tv rather than go out with them to the city.. good thing i had a good alibi not to go along (but really, im feeling sick naman talaga..).. hehe.. i just have the feeling na going out would also mean big chances of seeing familiar faces... just the thought of it still breaks my heart.. hay.. although, part of me really wants to see them too, and hug them.. really tight.. i dont know, maybe its plain cowardice..
the first night i came inside my room was really sad.. feeling my bed again and seeing things and toys which remind me of a lot of people brought me to tears again (buti na lang tulog na mga kapatid ko..).. so practically, i cried myself to sleep again during my first night here.. its so ironic that my home is giving me sad memories as well..
its only my second day here.. i was telling Pusong Matapang yesterday my thoughts of not leaving home (for good) was maybe just a product of exciting possibilities.. akala ko kaya ko na, hindi pa pala...
i really feel sick today.. the the cold wind outside is making it worse..
its my second day... its only my second day..
i still look forward to ending this year right..
at least,
end this year right..
i can only hope..
happy christmas everyone..
warm hugs and big smiles..: )
122610sunday
on the other hand, i still chose to just stay here and watch tv rather than go out with them to the city.. good thing i had a good alibi not to go along (but really, im feeling sick naman talaga..).. hehe.. i just have the feeling na going out would also mean big chances of seeing familiar faces... just the thought of it still breaks my heart.. hay.. although, part of me really wants to see them too, and hug them.. really tight.. i dont know, maybe its plain cowardice..
the first night i came inside my room was really sad.. feeling my bed again and seeing things and toys which remind me of a lot of people brought me to tears again (buti na lang tulog na mga kapatid ko..).. so practically, i cried myself to sleep again during my first night here.. its so ironic that my home is giving me sad memories as well..
its only my second day here.. i was telling Pusong Matapang yesterday my thoughts of not leaving home (for good) was maybe just a product of exciting possibilities.. akala ko kaya ko na, hindi pa pala...
i really feel sick today.. the the cold wind outside is making it worse..
its my second day... its only my second day..
i still look forward to ending this year right..
at least,
end this year right..
i can only hope..
happy christmas everyone..
warm hugs and big smiles..: )
122610sunday
Thursday, December 23, 2010
waningCRESENT
do you ever hear me calling?
cause every night
i'm talking to the moon
still trying to get to you
or am I a fool
who sits alone
talking to the moon
i know you're somewhere out there
somewhere far away
i'm talking to the moon...
122310thursday
littleREWIND
inaayos ko kanina yung mga gamit ko na dadalhin pag uwi ko bukas. then i came across the scrap book containing messages during the "send off".. nakita ko yung cd na galing kay Munting Tinig.. i remembered not playing it before kasi alam kong malulungkot lang ako at masasaktan..
surprisingly, i took it out sa plastic and set it up sa laptop for viewing.. i was actually having second thoughts of taking a peek of what's inside, pero tinuloy tuloy ko na lang.. i only chose the videos and pictures
na sa tingin ko kaya kong panoorin.. although i must say, there were videos i still watched kahit nakakalungkot panoorin.. mula "bagong buwan, love rendezvous, orsem, sv orientation, Tinig's prisaa competition and some other funny stuff" i watched it with mixed emotions..
God, it's sure nice to see those faces again.. i can also hear the echoes of laughters.. of corny jokes and even non-sense chats.. even memories of seeing them fall in love and moving on.. :) (love you boss and balei)
i am going home.. and i am having heavy sighs everytime i think that i'll be staying for a few days.. i even thought of just staying home and just lock myself up to watch cable all day long (after all, i miss watching csi, hbo, and star movies).. i am not even sure if i am ready to meet up with people (though i also want to see them and give them a hug).. and yes, i would also want to see the RuSsian river and greet him a happy christmas..(big sigh)..
bahala na...
i am going home (and who knows..) i may not leave home anymore.. : )
surprisingly, i took it out sa plastic and set it up sa laptop for viewing.. i was actually having second thoughts of taking a peek of what's inside, pero tinuloy tuloy ko na lang.. i only chose the videos and pictures
na sa tingin ko kaya kong panoorin.. although i must say, there were videos i still watched kahit nakakalungkot panoorin.. mula "bagong buwan, love rendezvous, orsem, sv orientation, Tinig's prisaa competition and some other funny stuff" i watched it with mixed emotions..
God, it's sure nice to see those faces again.. i can also hear the echoes of laughters.. of corny jokes and even non-sense chats.. even memories of seeing them fall in love and moving on.. :) (love you boss and balei)
it was like going back to hundred acre woods and reliving the memories of pooh corner.. damn, i am being melancholic again.. and i kinda hate it.. still, i am not denying the truth that i did smile seeing the gang again.. really..
bahala na...
i am going home (and who knows..) i may not leave home anymore.. : )
"may the moon remind you how much you are loved,
that even if we're miles apart, malaman mo sanang
somewhere out there,
someone's looking at the very moon you adore..
and somewhere out there,
someone who loves you adores that very moon.."
-brentworks/june2010-
122310thursday
Sunday, December 19, 2010
treasureBOX
ikaw ang aking pangarap
ikaw ang sagot sa ‘king dasal
puso ko ay inaalay
pagkat minamahal kitang tunay
ikaw ang aking pag-ibig
ang nagbibigay kulay sa ‘king daigdig
wala nang nanaisin pa
kung magpakailanman ay kasama ka
121910sunday
silentSIGHS
MYA, gud morning. what's your take on the invitation? you need not have extensive HR background. you'll learn it in the process, and nanay will help you here. i tell you, the work will be perfect for you, plus your heart will once more be home among hearts of the same cut and beat. just try and submit your resume.
121910sunday
121910sunday
Saturday, December 18, 2010
ofSEESAWS
sa hindi ko maipaliwanag na dahilan, naiyak ako kanina noong makita ko si hubert webb sa tv na nasa mall at nag eenjoy mag hanap ng sapatos na bibilhin niya.. napangiti ako habang pinapanood ko siya.. para siyang isang bata na masaya dahil makakapag laro na siyang muli sa mga kaibigan niya... makikita ang tuwa sa kanyang mukha, at pati na din ang mga matang nakikipag-usap dahil sa sayang nararamdaman..
sa kabilang banda naman ay nalungkot ako na makita si lauro vizconde.. gaya ng nabanggit sa ulat, walang bakas ng pasko ang makikita sa kanyang tahanan.. nalulungkot ako para sa kanya.. iniisip ko pa rin hanggang ngayon kung kelan siya huling humalakhak ng totoo.. iniisip ko din kung may katahimikan na ba siya sa puso niya pagkalipas ng maraming taon..
naisip ko uli, kung ako si hubert webb, masasabi ko ba talagang buo sa sarili ko na wala akong nagawang mali.. kung wala nga, makakatulog kaya akong mahimbing dahil sa binigay sa aking kalayaan..
naisip ko din si lauro vizconde.. hindi ko alam kung papano ko isasalarawan ang nararamdaman niya.. naka pag move on na kaya siya after all that happened.. masisilayan pa kaya ng tao ang mga mata niyang minsan ay naging masaya.. ano kaya ang sinabi niya sa Diyos matapos binigay ang hatol sa mga napawalang sala sa pangyari?
ewan ko.. pero twing nakikita ko silang pareho sa tv, hindi ko alam kung ano ang mas mangingibabaw sa kalooban ko..
bulong sa langit ngayon na sana ay makuha din nila pareho ang katahimikan na hahanap hanapin ng isang kaloobang minsan ng nasaktan at nakulong na dala ng kahapon...
121820saturday
sa kabilang banda naman ay nalungkot ako na makita si lauro vizconde.. gaya ng nabanggit sa ulat, walang bakas ng pasko ang makikita sa kanyang tahanan.. nalulungkot ako para sa kanya.. iniisip ko pa rin hanggang ngayon kung kelan siya huling humalakhak ng totoo.. iniisip ko din kung may katahimikan na ba siya sa puso niya pagkalipas ng maraming taon..
naisip ko uli, kung ako si hubert webb, masasabi ko ba talagang buo sa sarili ko na wala akong nagawang mali.. kung wala nga, makakatulog kaya akong mahimbing dahil sa binigay sa aking kalayaan..
naisip ko din si lauro vizconde.. hindi ko alam kung papano ko isasalarawan ang nararamdaman niya.. naka pag move on na kaya siya after all that happened.. masisilayan pa kaya ng tao ang mga mata niyang minsan ay naging masaya.. ano kaya ang sinabi niya sa Diyos matapos binigay ang hatol sa mga napawalang sala sa pangyari?
ewan ko.. pero twing nakikita ko silang pareho sa tv, hindi ko alam kung ano ang mas mangingibabaw sa kalooban ko..
bulong sa langit ngayon na sana ay makuha din nila pareho ang katahimikan na hahanap hanapin ng isang kaloobang minsan ng nasaktan at nakulong na dala ng kahapon...
121820saturday
Friday, December 17, 2010
palmsUP
a friend asked if i would want to join him to attend mass tonight, i said yes.
he was sitting on my right,
when it was nearly time to sing the Our Father
i traded place with him (so now he's on my left)
mahangin kasi masyado dito.. :)
121710friday
he was sitting on my right,
when it was nearly time to sing the Our Father
i traded place with him (so now he's on my left)
mahangin kasi masyado dito.. :)
121710friday
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
nineMORNINGS
may mga naka schedule na anticipated mass para sa simbang gabi. pero sinabi ko sa sarili ko na kakayanin kong sa umaga ako mag sisimba. aaminin ko, may malaking dahilan ako kung bakit ko gustong mabuo ang siyam na araw na iyon. alam din naman ng puso ko kung ano talaga ang dahilan kung bakit tayo may simbang gabi. pero aaminin ko pa rin, na maliban sa tunay na diwa ng simbang gabi, paraan ko ito para mas lalong ibulong (isigaw na pala) sa langit ang nag iisa kong hiling bago man matapos ang taong ito..
hindi labis ang hinahangad ko... naniniwala lang ako na sa likod na makapal na usok sa bagong langit ko, ay ang natatangi pa ring langit na kinasanayan ko..
hindi labis labis ang hinahangad ko... isang hiling lang.. isang araw man, isang oras, o kahit isang minuto lang..
121510wednesday
(oo, wednesday ngayon.. sana, lucky day ko)
daddysBOY
it was my papa's birthday last monday.. i remembered a friend's blog which i read last week.. it was a letter given to him by his father.. i remember getting teary-eyed reading it.. i asked my friend's permission if i could repost it as it may also inspire some of my readers (toinks) and appreciate their fathers even more.. (and what could be more sweeter than father and son blogging).. posting this again makes me go hai...
(CJs blog)
Here’s a letter my dad posted as a comment on my previous blog a week ago. I’ve asked his permission to post
it here as well. Kindly read on.
A Letter I’ll Write My Son, CJ, When I’m 60
Dear CJ,
I’d like to ask a favor. For my Birthday, Christmas, or Father’s Day, I don’t want another shirt. Or three pairs of socks. Or a bottle of whisky or brandy. Or rubber shoes.
Take a good look at me. My face has more wrinkles now. I’m getting old and these “things” don’t give me the joy that they used to. Do you want to make me happy, son? Stop giving me things. Instead, give me your presence.
Now I know you’re a busy man. Grown up and important. You’ve got a million things to do. You’ve got your own priorities. I understand, son. I really do. But once in awhile, do drop by or even just a text, and tell me you remember me.
I’ll be in ecstasy, if you bring me out for lunch (maski ako ang taya). Or bring me in any place you want — just the two of us (maski ako man giraray ang taya). Let’s talk about everything and anything. I’d like to laugh with you again. The same way we did when I used to bring you out, pasyar sa downtown maski mayong kuarta; when you were tiny enough that I could carry you in my arms when you slept through a movie; and when your favorite topic of conversation was about WHAT IS MOSS? and Cartoons and lots of questions. Oh CJ, I miss you so much.
I want you to know that every so often, I open your room and your cabinet. In it are your clothes, things. And in case you didn’t know, I still like looking at our old photo albums. In these old photos, I see you as a shy good looking child hiding behind your mother’s skirt. I can still vividly remember your picture taken during the Search for Ms. & Mr. Kiddy Garden. You were wearing a white tuxedo, though, I can’t remember know where I got the money, wheew, that’s P800 bucks CJ. Hehehe. I see you blowing candles on your birthday cake. When you cry, I carried you in my arms and wipe the tears flowing down on your cheeks. Remember when you played in the monkey bar at the Manila Zoo? Oh your mommy and I and even your sister, nini, were so worried and afraid when you fell but change it with laughter, when we you’re okay. Why we laughed? Well, because when you fell, your eyes were so big and rounded.
Reminiscence rush over me like a river. My heart swells with pride as I think of you. Oh, how proud I am that you’re my son.
But you know what, son? Looking back all these memoirs makes me feel old. Very old. I’m struck at how unforgiving time is. Yes, it flies. And time will continue to fly ever so swiftly, and one day, I will be gone.
But mark my words, CJ. Each day, in Heaven, I shall watch over you. My love will continue beyond the grave, beyond the boundaries of heaven and earth. My love for you will remain forever.
Son, I’m still here. With you. While I’m on planet earth, once in awhile, give me your presence. When you were 7 years old, you used to shout, “Daddy, I love you,” and instantly, I’d get a lump in my throat, my eyes would moisten, and my chest would be filled with warmth.
CJ, after all these years, you’re a grown up man now. But nothing has changed between us. Tell me those words again, “Daddy, I love you,” and instantly, I’d still get a lump in my throat, my eyes would still moisten, and my chest will still be filled with warmth.
Noy, let’s make an agreement: No matter how corny it gets, let’s not stop hugging each other. The older I am, the more I need those hugs. I don’t want a shirt. I want you, son, even if it’s just a few minutes of your time.
Love,
Dad
PS: Why did I write this Letter? Just to let you know, I’ll be 50 next year. I’m still 14 years away from 60. So why write this letter? To remind myself the most important things in life.
At the end of the day, I’m wealthy not because of the money in the bank but because of the love in my relationships. I’ll never be happy in life if I’m not happy in my family relationships.
I urge you to always put your family first. This is your most important wealth!
121510wednesday
(oh, its wednesday)
happy wednesday papa
in the eyes of a child, SUPERMAN is REAL.. |
Here’s a letter my dad posted as a comment on my previous blog a week ago. I’ve asked his permission to post
it here as well. Kindly read on.
A Letter I’ll Write My Son, CJ, When I’m 60
Dear CJ,
I’d like to ask a favor. For my Birthday, Christmas, or Father’s Day, I don’t want another shirt. Or three pairs of socks. Or a bottle of whisky or brandy. Or rubber shoes.
Take a good look at me. My face has more wrinkles now. I’m getting old and these “things” don’t give me the joy that they used to. Do you want to make me happy, son? Stop giving me things. Instead, give me your presence.
Now I know you’re a busy man. Grown up and important. You’ve got a million things to do. You’ve got your own priorities. I understand, son. I really do. But once in awhile, do drop by or even just a text, and tell me you remember me.
I’ll be in ecstasy, if you bring me out for lunch (maski ako ang taya). Or bring me in any place you want — just the two of us (maski ako man giraray ang taya). Let’s talk about everything and anything. I’d like to laugh with you again. The same way we did when I used to bring you out, pasyar sa downtown maski mayong kuarta; when you were tiny enough that I could carry you in my arms when you slept through a movie; and when your favorite topic of conversation was about WHAT IS MOSS? and Cartoons and lots of questions. Oh CJ, I miss you so much.
I want you to know that every so often, I open your room and your cabinet. In it are your clothes, things. And in case you didn’t know, I still like looking at our old photo albums. In these old photos, I see you as a shy good looking child hiding behind your mother’s skirt. I can still vividly remember your picture taken during the Search for Ms. & Mr. Kiddy Garden. You were wearing a white tuxedo, though, I can’t remember know where I got the money, wheew, that’s P800 bucks CJ. Hehehe. I see you blowing candles on your birthday cake. When you cry, I carried you in my arms and wipe the tears flowing down on your cheeks. Remember when you played in the monkey bar at the Manila Zoo? Oh your mommy and I and even your sister, nini, were so worried and afraid when you fell but change it with laughter, when we you’re okay. Why we laughed? Well, because when you fell, your eyes were so big and rounded.
Reminiscence rush over me like a river. My heart swells with pride as I think of you. Oh, how proud I am that you’re my son.
But you know what, son? Looking back all these memoirs makes me feel old. Very old. I’m struck at how unforgiving time is. Yes, it flies. And time will continue to fly ever so swiftly, and one day, I will be gone.
But mark my words, CJ. Each day, in Heaven, I shall watch over you. My love will continue beyond the grave, beyond the boundaries of heaven and earth. My love for you will remain forever.
Son, I’m still here. With you. While I’m on planet earth, once in awhile, give me your presence. When you were 7 years old, you used to shout, “Daddy, I love you,” and instantly, I’d get a lump in my throat, my eyes would moisten, and my chest would be filled with warmth.
CJ, after all these years, you’re a grown up man now. But nothing has changed between us. Tell me those words again, “Daddy, I love you,” and instantly, I’d still get a lump in my throat, my eyes would still moisten, and my chest will still be filled with warmth.
Noy, let’s make an agreement: No matter how corny it gets, let’s not stop hugging each other. The older I am, the more I need those hugs. I don’t want a shirt. I want you, son, even if it’s just a few minutes of your time.
Love,
Dad
PS: Why did I write this Letter? Just to let you know, I’ll be 50 next year. I’m still 14 years away from 60. So why write this letter? To remind myself the most important things in life.
At the end of the day, I’m wealthy not because of the money in the bank but because of the love in my relationships. I’ll never be happy in life if I’m not happy in my family relationships.
I urge you to always put your family first. This is your most important wealth!
121510wednesday
(oh, its wednesday)
happy wednesday papa
Monday, December 13, 2010
Sunday, December 12, 2010
playBUTTON
i was talking to an old friend when he asked me what songs i have in my ipod.. i mentioned to him a few and he said that it badly needs an overhaul.. bagongLANGIT also means playing new songs.. so he set a date for the overhaul thing..
he connected the ipod to his laptop.. and laughed a bit when he saw that some songs had its frequency count on how many times it was played... he laughed even more when he came across the different song titles.. damn.. now he's having a bigger peek of my world.. haha..
all songs highlighted and then the delete button was tapped.. a big sigh came out.. haay.. the songs i'm holding on to were now deleted.. (another bigsigh).. anyway, i still managed to project a smile.. :)
then we, (together with another friend) decided to go for a walk.. we found a place where we can sit and enjoy the very few stars above us.. there was also the smell of cold december night breeze with the aroma of hot chocolate in the nearby house.. we shared stories and visited memory lane.. then came a group of young boys with their guitars.. they started to play with the strings and in a few minutes, i heard a very familiar song...
he connected the ipod to his laptop.. and laughed a bit when he saw that some songs had its frequency count on how many times it was played... he laughed even more when he came across the different song titles.. damn.. now he's having a bigger peek of my world.. haha..
all songs highlighted and then the delete button was tapped.. a big sigh came out.. haay.. the songs i'm holding on to were now deleted.. (another bigsigh).. anyway, i still managed to project a smile.. :)
then we, (together with another friend) decided to go for a walk.. we found a place where we can sit and enjoy the very few stars above us.. there was also the smell of cold december night breeze with the aroma of hot chocolate in the nearby house.. we shared stories and visited memory lane.. then came a group of young boys with their guitars.. they started to play with the strings and in a few minutes, i heard a very familiar song...
does the pain weigh out of the pride,
and you look for a place to hide,
did someone break your heart inside, you're in ruins..
one, twenty one guns, lay down your arms, give up the fight..
i looked up and thank God for the stars (kahit mabibilang lang sila..).. and held tightly with my two hands my eclipse necklace.. i closed my eyes and smiled.. my heart did too.. God, you really continue to surprise me.. : )
i still do not know the new playlists,
but i know i'll learn to love it as well (maybe, hehe)..
i guess listening to a new bunch of music will also prepare me for the new year that's ahead of me
(maybe again..)..
i can only hope..
(big sigh)..
(big sigh)..
121110saturday
Saturday, December 11, 2010
hundredacreWOODS
WisdomTooth: nareceive mo text ko?
Mya: hindi, bakit..
WisdomTooth: HR Opening
P15k starting
Supervisory level
80 pax lang
You will set up the HR System and document the procedures
Local pero Manila rate starting
Salary to increase after 3 mos
Near support group
Low cost of living
May cura personalis na workgroup and most importantly
Rayaon kami
Mya: when do you need the answer?
WisdomTooth: can you give it now?
Mya: no i can't..
what is this? (i thought).. more than anything else, the later parts of the information were the best offers for the job post.. (i thought again).. am i ready to go home?
i texted Pilyong Querubin about it.. and he said, "whatever will make you happy.. "
Damn! bakit may mga ganitong roadsigns?
121110saturday
Mya: hindi, bakit..
WisdomTooth: HR Opening
P15k starting
Supervisory level
80 pax lang
You will set up the HR System and document the procedures
Local pero Manila rate starting
Salary to increase after 3 mos
Near support group
Low cost of living
May cura personalis na workgroup and most importantly
Rayaon kami
Mya: when do you need the answer?
WisdomTooth: can you give it now?
Mya: no i can't..
what is this? (i thought).. more than anything else, the later parts of the information were the best offers for the job post.. (i thought again).. am i ready to go home?
i texted Pilyong Querubin about it.. and he said, "whatever will make you happy.. "
Damn! bakit may mga ganitong roadsigns?
121110saturday
Friday, December 10, 2010
soSORRY
hay naku. ang arte/drama mo kasi. inis talaga ako.
oo na, maarte na kung maarte..
psst...
121010friday
oo na, maarte na kung maarte..
psst...
121010friday
Wednesday, December 8, 2010
BEstestBEst
Hail holy Queen enthroned above,
Oh Maria,
Hail mother of Mercy and of Love,
Oh Maria,
Triumph all ye cherubim!
Sing with us ye seraphim!
Heaven and Earth, resound the hymn!
Salve, salve-salve, salve Regina!
stayed at my favorite area during the mass.. i was feeling so tired that waiting brought me to sleep for a few minutes.. Pusong Matapang texted: "toinks, love kasi agad inisip mo.. pwede namang future best friend.."
i replied with: "meron na.. tinabi lang muna.. at ayaw kong palitan.."
the lord's prayer was sang beautifully by the choir.. i opened my palms up and smiled while listening.. eyes towards the cross.. then i found my right palm closing tightly towards the end of the song.. i let out a sigh.. why am i closing my palms again?..
i whispered to the Virgin Mary..
and i wonder..
naririnig ng langit ang dasal na sinasabi ng isip ko, ngunit alam kong naririnig din nito ang ibig sabihin ng bawat pintig ng puso ko.. alin kaya ang mas pakikinggan nila?
120810wednesday
(oh, it's wednesday)
Oh Maria,
Hail mother of Mercy and of Love,
Oh Maria,
Triumph all ye cherubim!
Sing with us ye seraphim!
Heaven and Earth, resound the hymn!
Salve, salve-salve, salve Regina!
stayed at my favorite area during the mass.. i was feeling so tired that waiting brought me to sleep for a few minutes.. Pusong Matapang texted: "toinks, love kasi agad inisip mo.. pwede namang future best friend.."
i replied with: "meron na.. tinabi lang muna.. at ayaw kong palitan.."
the lord's prayer was sang beautifully by the choir.. i opened my palms up and smiled while listening.. eyes towards the cross.. then i found my right palm closing tightly towards the end of the song.. i let out a sigh.. why am i closing my palms again?..
i whispered to the Virgin Mary..
and i wonder..
naririnig ng langit ang dasal na sinasabi ng isip ko, ngunit alam kong naririnig din nito ang ibig sabihin ng bawat pintig ng puso ko.. alin kaya ang mas pakikinggan nila?
120810wednesday
(oh, it's wednesday)
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
pbFOUR
three minutes...
two minutes...
one minute...
thirty seconds..
ten seconds...
five seconds..
two seconds...
memories are absurd things. some are vague, some crystalline, some too painful to recollect and some so painful it's impossible to forget. pain makes us who we are, it teaches us and tames us, it can destroy and it can save. we all have regrets - even frank sinatra had a few..
-pack up the moon by anna mcpartlin-
120710tuesday
Saturday, December 4, 2010
silverBELLS
when i speak of shangrila, it only means three things..
the usual dinner
free movies
and more free shows (and if you're lucky, free sweets after the show)...
:)
Berdeng Ibon and i came for a free christmas show.. we were lucky to enjoy and savor the music of the manila symphonic orchestra foundation.. hayy.. the music were really enchanting.. the repertoire of christmas songs, broadway, and classical music used in ballets and disney films brought me to close my eyes, smile, and be in cloud nine..
i found my body swaying with the beat of every broadway song.. my heart waltzed as the classic disney music were played, allowing me to be in trance as i imagine princes' and princesses dancing gracefully hand in hand.. my spirit was awaken as they played white christmas and christmas song.. really a beautiful feeling.. like a warm embrace to the very core of the soul..
the usual dinner
free movies
and more free shows (and if you're lucky, free sweets after the show)...
:)
Berdeng Ibon and i came for a free christmas show.. we were lucky to enjoy and savor the music of the manila symphonic orchestra foundation.. hayy.. the music were really enchanting.. the repertoire of christmas songs, broadway, and classical music used in ballets and disney films brought me to close my eyes, smile, and be in cloud nine..
i found my body swaying with the beat of every broadway song.. my heart waltzed as the classic disney music were played, allowing me to be in trance as i imagine princes' and princesses dancing gracefully hand in hand.. my spirit was awaken as they played white christmas and christmas song.. really a beautiful feeling.. like a warm embrace to the very core of the soul..
i'm dreaming of a white christmas
just like the ones i used to know
where the treetops glisten,
and children listen
to hear sleigh bell in the snow..
christmas is really coming, and it also means counting days para umuwi..
speaking of home, Bolang de Kanto, Dancing Shoes and some other familiar faces left earlier for bicol.. the past two weeks have been full of surprises.. but most of all, it gave me the feeling of being closer to my old heaven..
and oh yes,
just to add naughty smiles to hearbeat and simplixiety..
jam is here too..
i can still hear the music right now, and it says "and so i'm offering this simple phrase, to kids from one to ninety-two, although its been said many times, many ways, a very merry christmas to you..."
120410saturday
Friday, December 3, 2010
funnyBONES
category: novels turned to films
Mya: letters to John
Seth: toinks.. dear John..
PilosopongKomikero: angels vs demons..
Seth: toinks, wala nun..
Mya: oo wala nun.. out ka ng isa..
Mya: ako na.. angels and demons..
PilosopongKomikero: ang daya, yun ang ibig kong sabihin.. dapat counted yun sa akin..
Mya&Seth: ay hindi pwede, out ka na..
Mya: letters in a bottle..
PilosopongKomikero: toinks.. message in a bottle.. kanina mo pa pinipilit ang letters..
Seth:Jurassic Park
Mya: Godzilla
PK: wala nun..
Mya: meron.. check natin national bookstore mamya..
category: mga trabahong pang gabi
PilosopongKomikero: security guard..
Mya: call center agent..
Seth: pokpok..
PilosopongKomikero: bawiin ninyo yan, hindi yan trabaho..
Seth&Mya: trabaho kaya iyon..
PilosopongKomikero: zzzzzzzzz... (pikon na, ayaw ng kumibo).. pano ninyo nasasabing trabaho iyon... bawiin ninyo yan.. ginagawa ninyong comodity ang babae..
Seth&Mya: wahahahahaha...bahala ka, basta trabaho yun...
PK: change category...
category: colors
Seth: red
PilosopongKomikero: orange..
Mya: green
Seth&PilosopongKomikero: ano ka ba, mag roygbv muna tayo..
Mya: eh ayaw ko, green nga ang gusto ko..
orange.. blue.. silver.. periwinkle.. red orange.. pine green.. maroon..
PilosopongKomikero: hindi pa sinasabi ang purple ah..
Mya: hindi yun color..
Seth&PK: panong hindi yun naging color..
Mya: basta hindi yun pwede...
wala lang..
masaya lang balik-balikan..
ay.. lovelyBONES pala...
120310friday
Mya: letters to John
Seth: toinks.. dear John..
PilosopongKomikero: angels vs demons..
Seth: toinks, wala nun..
Mya: oo wala nun.. out ka ng isa..
Mya: ako na.. angels and demons..
PilosopongKomikero: ang daya, yun ang ibig kong sabihin.. dapat counted yun sa akin..
Mya&Seth: ay hindi pwede, out ka na..
Mya: letters in a bottle..
PilosopongKomikero: toinks.. message in a bottle.. kanina mo pa pinipilit ang letters..
Seth:Jurassic Park
Mya: Godzilla
PK: wala nun..
Mya: meron.. check natin national bookstore mamya..
category: mga trabahong pang gabi
PilosopongKomikero: security guard..
Mya: call center agent..
Seth: pokpok..
PilosopongKomikero: bawiin ninyo yan, hindi yan trabaho..
Seth&Mya: trabaho kaya iyon..
PilosopongKomikero: zzzzzzzzz... (pikon na, ayaw ng kumibo).. pano ninyo nasasabing trabaho iyon... bawiin ninyo yan.. ginagawa ninyong comodity ang babae..
Seth&Mya: wahahahahaha...bahala ka, basta trabaho yun...
PK: change category...
category: colors
Seth: red
PilosopongKomikero: orange..
Mya: green
Seth&PilosopongKomikero: ano ka ba, mag roygbv muna tayo..
Mya: eh ayaw ko, green nga ang gusto ko..
orange.. blue.. silver.. periwinkle.. red orange.. pine green.. maroon..
PilosopongKomikero: hindi pa sinasabi ang purple ah..
Mya: hindi yun color..
Seth&PK: panong hindi yun naging color..
Mya: basta hindi yun pwede...
wala lang..
masaya lang balik-balikan..
ay.. lovelyBONES pala...
120310friday
warmCHOCOLATE
"this actually isn't my favorite cup because i decided to leave my favorite cup in bicol.. i decided not to bring with me anything that would remind me too much of home.. so the cup i have here is something i just bought last night for the sake of this activity.. nonetheless, i find this cup special as it also symbolizes how i feel here and now.. an empty cup which is open to be filled with new experiences here in the metro.. hopefully, like all your cups, this too will witness forms of happiness in this new world i am in..."
i was really looking forward to this day.. the office was scheduled to have an activity in celebration of the advent season.. i was glad that i was tasked to be in charge of the preparations.. finally, the day came.. i was really happy to be sitting there and having my quiet time with my officemates.. then came the sharing..
i was teary-eyed while some of my officemates were sharing.. although they were not really very transparent with how they were (maybe) feeling.. suddenly, i heard a voice.. "bakit ka nag eemote dyan, e hindi mo naman turn mag share.. nauna ka pang mag emote.." then everyone else laughed.. i was surprised of the reactions.. i felt sized-up.. i felt that it's the most embarrassing moment of my life..
my turn to share came.. i composed myself, yet again got teary-eyed when i spoke of home.. they started to laugh again.. (big sigh).. my mind cannot fully understand why they were like that.. why some people can laugh at others in their sensitive moments..
on the other hand, i thought, this really is a different world in here.. a lot different from the world i used to have.. yung mundo na kahit walang sinasabi ang mga tao sa paligid mo, mararamdaman mo na walang masama kung umiiyak ka.. yung kahit hindi sila magsalita, mararamdaman mo na yakap ka nila..
two things..
first, i realized that in this world i am in, it's work and it's all about work..
second, in this world i am in, your head should be bigger than your heart..
(big sigh).. i was looking forward to the activity as i was so excited to get to know the other side of my new officemates.. well, i still did.. just that it's not what i was expecting.. lucky-unlucky-me..
i held the cup with my two hands and sip the warm chocolate in it.. the warmth of the porcelain on my hand and the warm feeling it gave me as i sipped it opened my heart to think of the many people i hold close in my heart.. vessels of my spirit.. yes, i remembered everyone.. and i remembered you too, more than once..
120310friday
i was really looking forward to this day.. the office was scheduled to have an activity in celebration of the advent season.. i was glad that i was tasked to be in charge of the preparations.. finally, the day came.. i was really happy to be sitting there and having my quiet time with my officemates.. then came the sharing..
i was teary-eyed while some of my officemates were sharing.. although they were not really very transparent with how they were (maybe) feeling.. suddenly, i heard a voice.. "bakit ka nag eemote dyan, e hindi mo naman turn mag share.. nauna ka pang mag emote.." then everyone else laughed.. i was surprised of the reactions.. i felt sized-up.. i felt that it's the most embarrassing moment of my life..
my turn to share came.. i composed myself, yet again got teary-eyed when i spoke of home.. they started to laugh again.. (big sigh).. my mind cannot fully understand why they were like that.. why some people can laugh at others in their sensitive moments..
on the other hand, i thought, this really is a different world in here.. a lot different from the world i used to have.. yung mundo na kahit walang sinasabi ang mga tao sa paligid mo, mararamdaman mo na walang masama kung umiiyak ka.. yung kahit hindi sila magsalita, mararamdaman mo na yakap ka nila..
two things..
first, i realized that in this world i am in, it's work and it's all about work..
second, in this world i am in, your head should be bigger than your heart..
(big sigh).. i was looking forward to the activity as i was so excited to get to know the other side of my new officemates.. well, i still did.. just that it's not what i was expecting.. lucky-unlucky-me..
i held the cup with my two hands and sip the warm chocolate in it.. the warmth of the porcelain on my hand and the warm feeling it gave me as i sipped it opened my heart to think of the many people i hold close in my heart.. vessels of my spirit.. yes, i remembered everyone.. and i remembered you too, more than once..
"if it is an empty cup,it only means it can still be filled up.. if its half-full, it means it can still over flow.. it's okay to have your cups empty once in a while so you can have room for more and new things.. they say a generous heart is never full because it continues to give and let go.."
-communaladventservice2010-
120310friday
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